Wednesday, April 30, 2014

Year One: An Escapade In Blathering

Well, it was one year ago today, when Reilly and I started this rambling blog.  If it has been an excruciatingly dull journey for you, just imagine how it feels for Reilly.  That's the equivalent of seven years of his life, that he can never get back.  Sure, the fame, the money, and the women might seem like ample compensation for our efforts, but a Jedi craves not these things.  We do this for nobler reasons.  We do it for the lulz.

To celebrate our one year blather-versary, I thought I would post up the most interesting search queries that have led people to our dark and musty corner of the internet.

1. drunken giraffe
2. kangaroo au pair
3. dog vs. kangaroo
4. lumberjack college
5. Why are running backs short?
6. dead prostitutes
7. dead hookers
8. Buffalo hookers (the murderers are getting a bit more specific)
9. average speed of a kangaroo
10. kangaroo squirrel
11. How much could a kangaroo bench?
12. Paul Worrilow is the most interesting man in the world
13. fat guys in spandex
14. Ron Jeremy length

To say that our small readership is probably made up of deviants and weirdos, would probably be an understatement.  I mean, let's ignore the dead prostitute theme here, and just focus on the person searching for a "kangaroo au pair".  Am I supposed to believe that there are individuals out there that want to employ a kangaroo as a nanny for their children?  Yes, it sounds awesome in theory, but the practical application of a kangaroo babysitter just doesn't strike me as terribly sensible.  Then again, judging such a concept without testing its real world feasibility, might be a product of my biases concerning gargantuan marsupials as care givers.  Maybe it would work?  The only way to know for sure is to test this concept in the laboratory.  So, if anybody could send me a kangaroo, or if you don't have that, if you happen to have a spare child lying around the house, we can begin testing this bold concept.  Maybe it will be the next billion dollar industry.

Either way, I don't want it to sound like Reilly and I are judging any of you sickos kind people.  I just really wanted to express my gratitude to the small group of people who have passed through these parts, and particularly the ones who have become regular visitors.  It's been rather nice, having strange people (kangaroo owning prostitute murderers?) to bounce these ideas off of, as my family seems to have the ability to block out most of my nonsense.  Those of you who I have been able to interact with, either through the comments section or through emails, have been very kind and supportive of our lunatic efforts.  The word 'idiot' hasn't been thrown at me nearly as much as I would have expected, or probably deserved.  Hopefully, as time goes on, we can remain on the right side of the ledger, in that sense.


  1. Keep it coming you murderous kangaroo prostitute..

    1. Personally, I would prefer to think of myself as a kangaroo pimp, for a high class and discerning clientele.

  2. What the guy above me said and didn't say says it all for those of who don't say what needs to be said. Confused? Good that means your not a genius and you can safely reads mr.kangaroos articles without risking your sanity.

    1. That seems to sum things up rather nicely.

    2. Thank you Sidney mussburger of kangaroo valley