Saturday, March 28, 2015

Cedric Thompson: Shopping For A Wedding Ring

I don't see any likely reason to suspect that my family is going to stumble into great wealth in the near future.  We are a rather humble group, with no exceptional traits that are likely to steer a fortune in our direction.  It seems that we are far more likely to ride someone else's coattails to the easy life.  With that in mind, I'm trying to get my sister to consider marrying Minnesota safety Cedric Thompson, whom I've already heaped some praise upon.  I have to admit that I've grown a bit infatuated with him as a draft prospect, and I'm sure my sister will learn to love him as well.

Thompson seems like a rather ideal prospect for this ploy.  He's currently projected to be no more than a late round draft pick, though it's even possible that he won't be selected at all.  So, he's probably a fairly humble guy, and might be willing to settle for someone like my sister.  I mean, let's face it, she's not going to be attracting any 1st round picks.  We have to aim a bit lower, and catch a guy before he really knows that he can do much better.  With that said, I really see no reason to think that Thompson isn't a superior prospect to someone like Landon Collins, who essentially plays the same position and is generally expected to be taken somewhere at the top of the draft.  My sister would sort of have to play the long game here, possibly waiting for Thompson's second NFL contract, but I'm willing to be patient.

Despite some differences in their physical builds, Thompson generally matches or surpasses Collins in most of the areas that probably matter.  When it comes to speed, Collins ran a 4.53 40 time, compared to Thompson's 4.46 (though some have suggested that his times were significantly better).  Collins' Kangaroo Score (our measure of lower body power), was an impressive 1.650, but despite being a bit smaller Thompson put up an equally impressive 1.605.  Unreliable and superficial speculation about the benefits of a player's size seem to be a possible illusion in this case.   Then we come to the subject of their nimbly-toed gracefulness, where Collins produced a wretched -1.738 Agility Score, compared to Thompson's much improved -0.462 (which is within the range we like to see for a strong safety).  Thompson should, based on the numbers, be capable of outperforming Collins in coverage.  Really, I see no area in which Collins is a better physical specimen to attach my family's financial hopes and dreams to.

Still, there seems to be a surprising lack of interest in Thompson, and I have to worry about whether he will be given much of an opportunity.  My future of sipping margaritas by the side of the pool really hinges on the possibility that he will get a legitimate chance to compete.  Well, there's that, and hoping my sister doesn't start packing on the pounds, thereby ruining this solid business plan.  So, we have to ask, can Cedric Thompson actually play, or is he just a physically gifted athlete?  Well, let's take a quick look.

As far as potential suitors go, I really see little reason to worry here.  In the games I have watched, Thompson seemed much more consistent at delivering the 'Wow' factor that I am hoping to find in a future groom/drinking buddy.  Collins, on the other hand, seemed to specialize in making me say 'Mehh'.  I may not be a great brother, but even I won't pimp my sister out to a prospect as uninspiring as Collins.

In the end, I have to suspect Thompson can make me my sister quite happy.  The only thing that confuses me, is why people believe that Landon Collins is some sort of special prospect, and Thompson is somebody that can be casually ignored.  If somebody wants to clarify this for me, I'm interested in hearing your arguments.  Then again, the possibility that the world is just ignorant of the brilliance of this 'get rich quick scheme' that I have concocted is the very reason why I may one day be living in the lap of luxury.  Maybe I should just keep my mouth shut about this, until we've got Thompson locked in as a future family member?  I guess I just have to convince my sister of the benefits of this plan, and maybe tart her up a bit.  Don't worry, I'll send wedding invitations to all of you, if this ingenious plot ends up working.


  1. Replies
    1. Sometimes my fingers get sore, and Reilly and I have to trade places at the keyboard.